Friday, May 22, 2015

“What does the Bible say about older women marrying younger men? I mean, what do you think about Cougars?”

Look, the Bible does not say anything about it. I don’t see anything bad with that because I don't even think the bible is against it either. People should not blame the women for going out with younger men because these men usually make the first moves. Those guys usually lie about their age just to get the woman. They are the ones who wooed these women. By the way, an older woman who has everything under control is more understanding. Furthermore, love has no age limits and love knows no age difference. The easiest way of sidelining the trauma of a bad marriage is to get involved with a wild wind relationship that sweeps you away from the pains of the past and in such a relationship, the younger man becomes the deuse ex machina who copiously provides the delectation eluding you. The attention the younger man will show you for the short period will surpass anything you have ever seen your whole life. There is no amount of attention and love a man who does not have to work or fend for bread for himself or his family cannot provide to a woman. However, I will show you some insights I got when I visited Mexico (experience), from successful married couples (reality) and what the Bible says (biblical).
Women mature faster than men, and the men live by sight rather touch. The man quickly loses interest in the woman as her physiognomy depreciates than the woman loses interest in him. Just 2 days ago, I read from The Telegraph that Jane Fonda complaining that in Hollywood, men only love younger women. It may end up leaving the woman lonely in her later years when she truly needs someone. To date a younger woman requires a lot more than it requires to date a younger guy. Most younger guys only want sex. Once they have it, they wander to oatfields like someone on soukougou. on the other hand, the older woman has the world under her feet, except love that has eluded her. She maintains the man; the man does not have to maintain her. She is the Svengali! Most young men in cougar relationships never seem to be in that relationship because you will hardly hear them tell the woman, “I love you.” What is love then if the man can never tell his lady, “I love you?” That is because those words if said in all honesty, do come with commitment which the tomboy is not ready to give.  
 In 2007, we went to Mexico to learn Spanish. I met a couple of teachers during our visits. I was always curious to ask the women who were divorced why they were divorced. Many of them told me that their husbands ran away with younger women. Biologically, women mature faster than men and having a younger man requires a lot of patience on the side of the woman because they will not be on the same level mentally. Their level of discourse or conversations is usually very short and of low quality.
Nonetheless, the advantage of having a younger man could outweigh the disadvantages because you could have much more good time in activities and sex too which the older men cannot provide. Remember that the woman is looking for thrilling adventures at this time. Most of the older guys are struggling to get it up, talk less of maintaining it up for longer stretches. They have a hibiscus which is beautiful to see, but they don't have a mimosa which will wake up when touched. If a woman has a huge sex drive, it is advantageous to date a younger man. Other than that, I don’t think it is a wise idea.
A younger man showing an interest in an older woman makes the woman feel very special because the guy has something he wants from the woman, so it will be attention 24/7. It looks odd to the society, but it is not biblically wrong. There is neither a biblical precedence nor is there any prohibition. In the biblical times, mostly men asked the woman out because of the culture back in the days, but things are different now. We are in a different era. Therefore, if the Lord has not given an opinion, man is unqualified to opine on that topic.
The Bible says that if two do not agree, they cannot walk together (Amos 3: 3). Those who have been married for 50 years and above have always told me that the secret is that they communicate together, they create common activities together, and they are patient with each other, no matter the frequency of their failures. Age really has no role to play in love because love is a bond in spirit that is physically administered in friendship. If their spirits bond well, nothing can put them asunder. If the man does not see a future with the woman, the relationship will only end with the bedroom. They must plan a common future. The woman must mean more than just a cougar; she must be part of him and him part of her.  The most important point will be for them to have common morals or virtues. It is useless for the woman to be against adultery when it is not a big deal to the man. If your problem is sex, and you are an older lady, it would be wise to marry a younger man. He wants your money, and you want his juice to rejuvinate you, so each should give generously. Therefore, I really do not see any problem.

Until then, love knows no bounds and should not know age difference. 

St Arrey of Ntenako

“Bonyfish beware because the same net that caught the jawless fish, caught the cartilaginous fish” (Hamilton Ayuk). Beware earthly paradise seekers because there is a serpent in every paradise"(Hamilton Ayuk). "If in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are of all men most miserable." (I Cor 15:19). "It is not how well you know a person; it is how well you treat them that they will live longer and happier with you." Hamilton Ayuk. Idle people write, idler people read, and idlest people read and whine that idle people are taking their time (Hamilton Ayuk).

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