Tuesday, December 23, 2014

Who to Blame when 7 out of 23 adolescent girls on a field trip come back home pregnant?

28 students who were 13 and 14 years old from Banja Luka in Serbia went to Sarajevo, Bosnia-Herzegovina for a fieldtrip to see museums and other landmarks, but 7 of them returned home pregnant.  The parents are blaming the teachers, and the teachers are blaming the parents. The same problem bedevils America with summer camps where many girls came back pregnant. Theses ones are unfortunate because there is no ground for abortion since they don’t have the money. If they had the means to abort, no one would have heard a word. Why do you think young boys and girls are very excited about summer camps? Nonetheless, who is to blame?  
It is not only with sex; it is also with misbehavior at school. This is exactly what the teachers decry all along about informal education. Education is in two categories: informal and formal. The former starts at home and reinforces the latter that is taken in school. When a student shoots people, the school and school system should not be held responsible because if the child was well taught at home that killing was bad, that child would not have killed.
Many parents don’t have that bond with their children, so it is difficult for the students to learn anything from them. Many families do not talk and when they talk, it is only accusations. You did this and you did that. They do not sit and have a nice conversation without someone getting angry. Parents have to create teachable moments at home. The question is, “how much do the parents themselves know to teach their kids?”
What about the kids with no parents? What about those in the shelters and group homes? It is clear and certain now that kids can learn from their parents. That is why Solomon said, “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it (Prov. 22:6).”  There is lack of mutual regulation between the parents and the children. If a teacher was talking about sex, parents will complain that it is not a sex education class. If the sex education teacher talks about masturbation, then they say that he or she has given the children to the devil. To avoid ambiguity of parent’s behavior, teachers leave it alone. The parents then should have taught those kids as they were growing up about the sex and its byproducts. When kids are going to a trip, the parent who knows that the child is not on birth pills should give them condoms. Kids should be taught about wearing condoms for fear of not only unwanted pregnancy but also transmissible diseases. Nowadays, in most schools even a mere attempt to moralize students is considered religion. They reject moralization, yet they cry of teenage pregnancy.
In a situation like this, the parents bear 100% of the blame and not the teachers. Would a teacher go to supervise the kids at all times? How many minutes does it take for sex that can cause pregnancy to happen? Would the teacher chain the kids on a field trip? Would the teacher not sleep? Teenage or underage Pregnancy is not a cognitive failure; it is a moral failure.
The parents have taken away the teacher’s rights and abilities to moralize their kids, so they should bear the brunt of any failure. Those are the byproducts of failed informal education.  I always tell my students that I am your role model, so you look unto me. That is usually an attempt to fill the gap and lacuna of informal education.

Until then, the parents should assume their responsibilities and leave those teachers alone!  

St Arrey of Ntenako

“Bonyfish beware because the same net that caught the jawless fish, caught the cartilaginous fish” (Hamilton Ayuk). Beware earthly paradise seekers because there is a serpent in every paradise"(Hamilton Ayuk). "If in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are of all men most miserable." (I Cor 15:19). "It is not how well you know a person; it is how well you treat them that they will live longer and happier with you." Hamilton Ayuk. Idle people write, idler people read, and idlest people read and whine that idle people are taking their time (Hamilton Ayuk).

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