As I listened again, I heard this time a louder sound, poom paaap! It was not only her problem or mine; it is the problem of all human beings. I mean, every human being shits. Therefore, every human being carries shit in his or her stomach. I have tried to wonder whether God created Adam and Eve with shit, or it was after they sinned that they started carrying shit. Well, I will not bother about that. I will just explain why you and your friends carry shit and "are full of shit."
I remember how I exchanged some hot debate with a certain participant on the internet. I could not believe that I wrote everything that was there. It was mean and despicable. I thank God that the forum deleted everything. You do not even know the shit that can come out of you.
I really like it when I am shitting because it feels good to shit. It would not seem as if something bad was coming out; it actually feels as if something beautiful was descending from my stomach. It keeps coming out that I want to keep shitting, but then I had emptied my entire bowels. I am not aware if it was smelling hard too, but I do remember that it was huge. The more I push, the more resistant and pain it showed me.
The only time I don't like to shit is when I had eaten dry stuff, and my shit is coming out like a huge block. It is hard and resistant. It does not want to come out, so it takes a break on my anus door. Then with more efforts, I push. I am crying in my heart, " oh who sent me to eat dry burgers oh. Who can deliver me here?" By a stroke of determination, it drops out, coming out with some drops of blood. That is a huge deliverance, my friend.
You see, you shit and when you do, it stinks and then it is huge too at times. Sometimes you shit like baby food and other times, you shit like little stones or palm kernels falling off the windmill. I mean, I have shit all kinds and seen all types too. Other times, I shit, and it will take me like two days to recover because it was huge, strong and hurtful on my anus.
If I was a bird, I know on whose head I will shit, or if I was a dog, I know on whose yard I will surely and daily shit. Yeap, you heard me well! Look, don’t lift your nose as if I am the only one who shits.
This is one thing all of us have in common. Sometimes you have shit and it has refused to be buried, so you solicited the help of a plunger. Boy, by the time you finish reading this article, you will be a specialist in conjugating the verb "to shit".
I am picturing a stupid judge now sitting in court with his stinking anus, passing a bad verdict from a false police summon. Let me imagine someone I don't like with their stinking anus. Hahahaha, you smile; don't you? You should not stop before I finish telling you the story about shit. Are you satisfied with their stomach carrying shit? I don't mean yours; we take for granted that you should be with yours; otherwise, you would have cut off your smelly-shitty stomach away.
Some people carry more shit, so we say that "they are full of shit". I know some carry more shit than others, like you lifting up your nose. You carry a little bit of shit than me, and you walk with a stinky anus too! If you doubt me, put your finger into your anus anytime of the day and tell me how it smells. If someone told you that I have not done anything good with my life, well tell them I discovered that they walk with stinky anuses! You should not forget to name me as the discoverer of the year!
That is how the shit from each of us reacts. Some of us have shit that sounds louder each time it falls down. Others’ shit does not sound that loud. It does not do so because it is very soft. However, I knew the guy sitting by me. His was dysentery, so it was throttling like a bad motorcycle trying to start, “praapprhhhhpaa!” We can call that #8. I turned and looked at him, but he had to take care of business, so he did not even mind me. He was having no part of my foolishness.
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“Bonyfish beware because the same net that caught the jawless fish, caught the cartilaginous fish” (Hamilton Ayuk). Beware earthly paradise seekers because there is a serpent in every paradise"(Hamilton Ayuk). "It is not how well you know a person; it is how well you treat them that they will live longer and happier with you." Idle people write, idler people read, and idlest people read and whine that idle people are taking their time (Hamilton Ayuk).