Monday, May 14, 2012

“How can a preacher ask a woman for a kiss; is that biblical?”

Many people have always wondered whether it is appropriate to ask a girl to kiss you or even greet the opposite sex with a kiss. Sisters in Christ always say they will “give you only a hug” as if a hug is holier than a kiss. Does the Bible accept or reject kisses? Is it that our syneideisis is more righteous than the recommendations of the Bible, or is it merely sanctimony? Should Christians even hug each other? This lesson will answer those questions as we enter into an age where good is evil and evil is good.   
The Old Testament shows that children kissed their parents (Gen 27:26; 2 Sam 209), lovers kissed each other (Sgs 8:1). The New Testament on the other hand shows that traitors kissed their victims to identify them (Mt 26:48) in what generally called the Kiss of Death. Adoring fans kissed their heroes as Jesus approved a woman kissing his feet (Lk 7:45). The Apostle Paul adjures the Romans, Corinthians and Thessalonians to salute (greet) each other with a holy kiss (Rom 16:16; I Cor 16:20; 2 Cor 13:12; I The 5: 26). That beckons the question: is there anything as a sinful kiss?    
Kissing is a form of greeting in most oriental societies. It is only in the West that every kiss means sex or an erotic relationship. There are many forms of greetings like kissing on both cheeks (French, British, Belgians), shaking hands (Americans, British, Hungarians), nodding the head (Chinese), hugging (Americans, Africans. Latin Americans, Europeans and Australians), and bowing (Japanese). Hence, there are many different forms of greetings in which kissing is amongst.
So, why do some Christians classify kissing as carnal if kissing was a form of greetings in the Old Testament, New Testament, part of the Early church’s greeting style, and contemporary society? It is perhaps because many have misused it. Many female Christians have told brothers in Christ that they prefer to give them a hug than a kiss. In every logical and carnal perception, a hug is more dangerous than a kiss as a hug transfers erotic heat more than a kiss. To me, a hug will easily lead into sin than a kiss, especially because we have already removed French kiss on the table as an option of non-committed couples. For people to passionately kiss each other, they must be in a committed relationship that intends to end in marriage whence they will continue the act to add impetus to their relationship.
Nonetheless, can we say that a hug is inherently evil? It is not at all because the intent in the heart engenders the evil. Those who see evil in the kiss or the hug have the lust in their hearts which upgrades into sin built on a hug or kiss. They do it for sinful purposes or to arouse themselves. Those who use it as a simple form of greetings do not harbor same feelings because “Unto the pure all things are pure: but unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled Titus 1:15.
However, the bible was not written and cannot be practiced in a cultural vacuum. If we learn “love your neighbor as yourself,” we need people to go and practice the concept else it is abstract knowledge. It is the same thing with greeting each other with a kiss. As much as we will like to greet each other with a kiss, we must be mindful of the culture. If that culture regards kissing as sinful eventhough it is not, we still have to refrain from it until such time when we may have enlightened contenders to know that it is  a mere form of greeting.   
Therefore, Christians can continue greeting each other with a kiss, or hug, or whatever form their culture permits. Those who consider a hug and a kiss can select another method for greetings, perhaps simply handshakes, but they should not condemn those who greet with a hug or a kiss.  

Until then feel free to kiss r hug each other as the Lord permits.

St Arrey of Ntenako. 

“Bonyfish beware because the same net that caught the jawless fish, caught the cartilaginous fish” (Hamilton Ayuk). Beware earthly paradise seekers because there is a serpent in every paradise"(Hamilton Ayuk). "It is not how well you know a person; it is how well you treat them that they will live longer and happier with you." Idle people write, idler people read, and idlest people read and whine that idle people are taking their time (Hamilton Ayuk).

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