Actually, she knew her boyfriend when she was 17, but she had had a lesbian tryst with a cousin who spent the night for a stay-over when she was 8. Despite all these boys she joked and flirted with, she feared she could grow fat or die alone. She was not promiscuous, which made it difficult for her to really retain a man for long considering that most men nowadays shy away from the responsibility of marriage and just want happenstance and adventures.
The other women were jealous of her, whether for her beauty or for her self confidence I don’t know. Men envied her and made sexist statements if they could not get her friendship. The men whom she had rejected slandered her that she was a lesbian. Those whom have regarded her as a sex object were now discouraged and disappointed because no matter how much they tried, they could not sniff her panties. Finally, the neighborhood saw her with a guy she introduced as her boyfriend. He was a musician and the envy of all young girls in the neighborhood. Notwithstanding, she was still not fulfilled.
Why was she always sad within when she had the envy of most women: old and young? She had the beauty, she had the career, and she now has a companion. The truth about it is that she knew very well that the boyfriend did not have commitment as a principle and objective in life, but he was the type who made her look very fulfilled in front of her friends and enemies. She knew he was the type of boyfriend that if she lost a limb, he will dump her for the one with limbs, yet she consoled herself that the time had not come.
She was worried about getting fat which was like a chronic disease of most young girls, so she invested her time and resources in weight loss products and made the gym her living room. She was beautiful; yet with low self-esteem. You knew it only when you were with her. She worried daily that she would one day end up alone, or if she had anyone, he was going to be an abuser or even a parasite that will suck blood and water from her until she sells herself to coping mechanism and then die finally at a young age. She was also too worried that men appreciated her sex appeal and beauty but not her intellect and her passion.
There were tail telling signs that she ignored. Although they were both into each other, they were not like minded. They wanted to have sex every minute of the day and wanted to be with each other every minute of their lives, but he was so money minded and did not consider family as important as she did. She has lived beauty and known that life was not all about beauty, but he was still striving to show people he was handsome. You have often heard that violence is the weapon of weak communicators. Her boyfriend had a pendulum temperament that swung by at home according to his day outside. They could never resolve their problems by themselves without him trying to involve his female friends. He will say “ Angelica, you are a woman, is Paulina right? In addition, she wanted to further her education, but he thought education was a waste of time and money. Just the mere fact that he looked at her as a sex object could have opened her eyes, but she thought that she will change him when they got married. She forgot that our people say “You can easily reform a boyfriend but not a husband; you tolerate the husband only.” She knew that he had a lot of things she must changed in him while he thought she needed to go to a survivor school to be street smart.
He had quickly noticed that there were many things she could do well, but that was not what mattered to her boyfriend. He spoke to her in terms of a trophy he will hoist around but wanted to be replaced at anytime if it was not more the winning trophy. Her boyfriend has successfully kept his drug addition and pornography away from her. Not sooner were they married did she start to see signs. Despite all the sex she gave him, he was still fantasizing about the girls outside. He flirted and was still on dating sites, even though he was married. He kept female companions with whom they went out regularly to clubs and parks. As life may have it; she could remember the good men she turned down because of either color, height or wealth. Now she seems to have gotten stuck with the one time Mr. Right who has become a match from hell. Paulina, who would you blame?
If you are a beautiful girl, know that beauty does not last for ever. Garnish your beauty with virtues that are not ephemeral. Character does not hide; you should go for the man whose character will make your life joyful. And for those men who are married but want to live single lives, beware you will soon become single and looking. If you are married but want to live like you are single, you will never have a lengthy and happy marriage. Paulina, love and marriage are for people who want commitment so next time go for the man who has shown great signs of commitment and care.
Until then, keep praying for Paulina.
Prince & PA Hamilton Ayuk.
“Bonyfish beware because the same net that caught the jawless fish, caught the cartilaginous fish” (Hamilton Ayuk). Beware earthly paradise seekers because there is a serpent in every paradise"(Hamilton Ayuk). Idle people write, idler people read, and idlest people read and whine that idle people are taking their time (Hamilton Ayuk).