Friday, July 31, 2009

“Why Do Men Cheat?”

Permit me say that both men and women cheat though statistics show that women cheat more than men . In this lesson, I will give you the reasons but after each reason, I will suggest a possible solution per God’s word. There are about seven prominent reasons why men cheat. Men cheat because sin is a nature of humanity. Men live by sight; they easily lose appetite for the woman’s physiognomy, nature’s payback, consequences of a nagging spouse, bad company and a pretext to end a bad relationship.

Every human being has a sinful nature that leads him or her into sin (Ps 51:5). Some have allowed this nature to dominate them while others have resisted the urge, but the surest way of resisting this nature is by walking in the Spirit so that you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh (Gal 5:16). That is why couples should pray together, walk together, go out together and strive to be together. This entire personal space thing is a loophole invitation for the Devil to spoil your relationship.

The second reason why some men cheat is because men are anatomically fashioned to live by sight while women live by touch. Jacob just merely saw Rachel and fell in love with her (Gen 29:10; 18). To be able to break a woman’s barriers, you must touch her senses while with the man, all he needs to do is see a woman and he becomes unstable. It is not for nothing that the Bible says “it is good for a man not to touch a woman” (I Cor 7:1). It is generally believed that men use more logic while women use more emotion. That is why we say women have a feminine side while men have their masculine side. That does not mean that women do not reason. This may be an unjaundiced generality since it is intramural because the author is a man and has not experienced this theory. A good man should not live by sight; rather they should live by faith. (Hab 2:4). Those who live by sight follow their natural proclivities which are sinful, anyway.

One other reason why men cheat is because they easily lose appetite for the physiognomy of the spouse since women mature faster. To avoid this situation, a man should marry a woman who is younger than him and is more beautiful than his ugly self. That way you always look at her as a gift from God that needs to be cherished and loved; to be molly-cuddled and pampered with good treatment, lullabies, love poems and love songs. If a man is more handsome than the wife, it may augur an ill omen.

Whatever you sow is what you will reap (Gal 6:6-7). You may be fortunate not to reap the wild oaks you have sown, but if you sow infidelity, you will reap infidelity. Most women had premarital sex with the man they intended to marry. If you can cheat against your Maker, why wouldn't the man cheat against you? If you do not want infidelity in your marriage,you avoid premarital sex. If it happens, you try for it not to continue until you marry. If you cannot contain, you marry fast and live by faith.

Men cheat as a consequence of a nagging wife. A wife or spouse is there as a helpmeet (Gen 2:18). Solomon said that a virtuous woman “will do him good and not evil all the days of her life” (Prov 31:12). I don’t think nagging is doing anyone good all his life. When Isaac’s mother died, Rebecca comforted him (Gen 24:67). If a man cannot find comfort inside his home, he will solicit comfort outside. There are three things that will keep a man home (peace, sex and meals). In the absence of peace, he can get sex and meals anywhere. However, every man wants a place that he can sleep and at times snore without anyone beating him. A family that prays together, stays together, and the bond obtained in prayer strengthens the marital covenant and chases out infidelity.

Another reason that makes men cheat is bad company. “Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners” (I Cor 15:33). Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend (Prov 27:17). Therefore, you should walk with people who can impart your life positively. Do not walk all the time with cheaters, for they will impart you with cheating. Don’t allow your husband to walk with wayward men or friends.

Another reason why men cheat is because of the folly of wealth. “The love of money is the root of all evil” (I Tim 6:9-10). When a man has money, no matter how ugly he is, beautiful women will kiss him. Nowadays, gold-diggers or Coffee Bang Fengs can kiss even a frog. Consequently, a man must not love the world nor the things (money included) of the world because when you love the world you inherit “the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life”. These are all mundane things that will make you cheat.

Finally, some men cheat because they want to get out of a bad relationship. Rather than cheat just so the woman would get angry and leave, why not try to make it work?

However, not every man cheats, so it should not be a categorization of all men. There are some decent men out there. Make yourself descent and you will have a decent man. To avoid games don’t play them because games beget games and infidelity begets infidelity.

Until then, I wish you the grace in your choice of men.

Prince & PA Hamilton Ayuk.


“Bonyfish beware because the same net that caught the jawless fish, caught the cartilaginous fish” (Hamilton Ayuk).
Beware earthly paradise seekers because there is a serpent in every paradise"(Hamilton Ayuk).

Idle people write, idler people read, and idlest people read and whine that idle people are taking their time (Hamilton Ayuk).

My Little Immanuel Church!

Did you see my little Immanuel Church? That sat on top of reformed theology. It was not just the doctrine they taught; It wa...