Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Mister Musa’s Children - Akiritu

Akiritu was child number 1 born to Wei Musa and Krin Musa while they were serving in Fontem Sub Division, Manyu division. They then moved to Mamfe when Wei Musa was transferred as the adviser to the SDO. As luck may have it, he was the first to venture into the US. He over stayed his visa. Until now, he does not consider himself illegal because he did not enter illegally. He merely overstayed his visa. Nonetheless, to avoid embarrassment from overzealous immigration officers, he decided to go the route of dating for papers. His first woman was too wise for him. After they had saved enough money, she cried foul and he was thrown out of the house, losing the house and cars they bought. She had asked him to marry her, but he was refusing because she was pregnant. She said,  "If that is the case, I will fall down the stairs, and I will miscarry."
He was still not appeased. He left for a second with whom they moved to Atlanta. In Atlanta, they went to Downtown off Pryor Street where the immigration office is located and filed another petition for legal papers to stay in the US. Do not forget this word Downtown because you may soon need it. Each time Akiritu annoys Lashonda Shashonda, she will say "I am going to Downtown." Akiritu has bought Lashonda a car which she does not need to pay any car note, yet she could neither put gasoline into the car nor even put mere engine oil.
Akiritu has taken a name: Peter-James that she could pronounce easily. “Peter, I am right now off Cleveland Avenue, and my car just died down. Can you come get me right now (pause), Please?” Akiritu was a cab driver and was taking some clients to the airport. She calls again the second time, “Where are you? Mother fu..k.r? I just died down in the street. If I don’t’ see you now in the next 30 Minutes, I will just walk to Downtown.” Akiritu hurriedly dropped his passengers and rushed to Cleveland Ave only to realize the car stopped because the engine oil was finished. “Hey Peter, you gotta put some gas too “She ordered. “I don’t have money.” Peter stubbornly replied. “How come you don’t have money?” She questioned. “I will pass by your mother’s place when I come home today.”Akiritu promises.
This seems to be very tough for Akiritu especially because at the same time letters are coming from home asking him why he is not sending money like all others are doing. Finally, the immigration called them for an interview, and the lady pretends to be terribly sick. Why should she go when she knows if Peter has papers it would be weeding her green grass?
At the same time, Peter flirts with other ladies and meets Tammy. Tammy tells him at once, if you don’t have papers, I will help you. Akiritu imagines his sufferings coming to an end. He has made all sorts of kontri fashions to purify himself from any curse to no avail. This was his manna from heaven. “I did not even ask her, she proposed it to me.” He muttered to himself. “What a miracle?” He exclaimed. “Now I can tell Lashonda to kiss my A…” He boasted!
Lashonda called him and complained, “My car is down and gas is finished inside. Please, when coming bring some gas.” “I don’t have gas!” Akiri replied. “What?” She asks in utter bewilderment. “I don’t have gas. Am I Citgo or Racetrack? Don’t you know where Quicktrip is?” Akiri replied, this time with more impetus. “Well, I guess I just have to walk to Downtown.” She terrorized. “Don’t walk, Lashonda. You should run. You can even wait, I am coming to give you a ride to Uptown or whatever you call it.” He flouted her. She is appalled. Peter has never been that defiant. She thought to herself. Something should be wrong. She called her mother who came to her succor with gas.
Akiritu moved in with Tammy, though he has signed marital papers with Lashonda. They went to church and on their way back, a car slightly rammed into their back bumper in a way that even a fly will not feel the pain. Tammy runs out of the car and started to hold her waist and him holding his back. As she was dramatizing it, a car came from behind (as if saying: since you want to cry better cry now) and this time truly knocked her down, pulled her about twenty meters breaking part of her head and her left leg. Immediately as he saw the police coming, he started to hold his back and called for an ambulance, behaving as though he could not walk.
The police officer was questioning him about his insurance when a mischievous wind came from nowhere, blew off his insurance papers and other car particulars. Looking at the seriousness of not having insurance on the accident site as an illegal immigrant; Akiritu dove after the papers, as they flew across the road. Akiri pursued them until he caught them and brought the papers to the officer. The police soliloquized: “Isn’t him who was holding his back a few minutes ago as if he was dying. He turned to Akiri and said: “I can perceive you do no more need an ambulance. If you do you will be arrested for faking.” “No sir, this little exercise has made me well. I am fine officer.” Akiri replied. You smile don’t you?
Tammy now has scars all over her body. Akiritu and Tammy claimed the insurance money and when things began falling apart; Tammy hired hitmen to deal with Akiritu to settle him. He was shot on the head twice, but he survived. Tammy seeing she could go down, she accused him for raping the daughter. He was arrested, locked up, bailed and now lives on bond with a friend. This is the tale of Akiritu.
Until then, corruption begets corruption.

Hamilton Ayuk


“No matter how a rat becomes the house pet, if it is sleeping beside the bag of groundnuts the owner may not have much sleep. ” (Hamilton Ayuk)."If a goat runs from the owner’s leash it will be tied by the council in a market square" Hamilton Ayuk).

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